She picked up the knife.

It weighed heavily in her hand, like the weight of all the sins of her forefathers were…

No. That sucks. Where’s the backspace on this thing? Oh, there it is….backspace, backspace, backspace…start over.

She picked up the knife.

Blood glistened on the blade as if the stains of her forefathers’ sins were reaching from the grave…

Oh, my God! I think I’m gonna throw up! Jeeez-us!….backspace, backspace, backspace…this is takin’ too long. Highlight. Delete….

Deep breath… Let it out. Clear your mind. Now…start again…you got this…

She picked up the knife.

It was a dark and stormy knife….

What the hell?? Highlight. Delete… Beer… need a beer…

“Ah … That’s good. Okay. Back to work. Come on! You’re a writer, dammit! Fucking write!”

What’s the damn prompt again? Oh, yeah…

She picked up the knife.

Holding it before her, the only defense between her soft, voluptuous, virginal body and the slobber-covered row of serrated teeth shining ghostly white from the mouth of the demon…

Backspace…backspace…backspace…highlight….delete….backspace…Jeez-us H Christ on a fuckin’ stick…drink more beer….burp….Jeez Louise…

“Shit! Who the hell is callin’ me? I’m tryin’ to work here!…Hello?”

Gonna bitch slap this heifer. She knows this is my writing time.

“Hey, Sis. What’s goin’ on?…No, I wasn’t busy. Whatchu need?…Again? I already blocked off that hole they dug under the skirtin’ on your trailer…Well, yeah, if you’re hearin’ ‘em bangin’ around in the AC vents…No, no, no. You don’t need to evacuate the kids…They’re ‘possums, Sis…they aren’t man-eaters…There’s no such thing as land sharks…”

This woman don’t have two functioning brain cells to rub together.

“Sure…yeah…It will be tomorrow afternoon, but yeah, I’ll come take a look at it…No, it’s not a problem…Not a bit of bother, Sis…You call me if you need me for anything…Love you, too…yeah…bye, now.”

I need another beer… Whoa! This one’s really cold…Must be one I put in yesterday…Now… back to work…

She picked up the knife.

The blade flashed in the bright overhead light as she turned it side to side, then plunged it into the fuckin’ phone when it rang again…

Goddammit! Now what?

“Hello?… Hey, Allen…Yeah, I’m working on it now…Good, it’s comin’ along really good…Oh, yeah, this is a done deal. I got this in the bag, buddy! When I get that first-place prize money in hand, we’re heading to the steak house on half-price beer night!…Shit, no, there’s no ball-and-chains allowed on this road trip…yeah….okay….sounds good…yeah, let me get back to work…I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

So much for the beer being cold…turning off the fuckin’ phone….where was I?

She picked up the knife.

The weight in her hand was familiar. The worn leather around the hilt was warm against her palm. Holding it up, the blade flashed with reflected light. A single drop of bright red blood slid painstakingly slow down the razor-sharp edge. Instinctively, she licked the blood from the blade.

Oh, hell, no. No sparklin’ vampire shit…backspace…backspace…

She picked up the knife.